Hump Day ~ Ta-dah!!

Wow - hump day - and not because it is Wednesday. After a slow gym day yesterday, I took a wonderful nap. Last night I slept like a log for long stretches of time. This morning I was back at almost full force in gym. Whole exercises that I missed yesterday I did with energy today. My body feels so good. Incredible. It can happen so fast when it seems like it is taking so long. Yay, health and healing and being back to “normal”!! 

Return to Normal

Back to “normal” ~ whatever that means. Up about 6:30 this morning, did the usual stuff and by shortly after 7:30 was headed for the gym. Gym was certainly Not normal but at least I was there. I spent about 15 minutes, did only three exercises very slowly and for a very short period of time ~ and that was more than if I had stayed sitting at home. 

PO had only one book for Dean. Grocery store for dog food and a couple of other necessities. Took my time, leaned on my cart if I needed to. Home by shortly after 8:30. 

Bathed, dressed and have a load of kitchen towels in the washer. And I think that is about as normal as it is going to get today. My body is ready to rest, to stretch out on the window seat in my warm sun spot and maybe even nap. I think energy from this bout is going to be a long time coming back. And in order to have energy, you have to expend energy. In order to expend energy, you have to have energy. So I will head for the window seat and absorb some solar energy and maybe tomorrow I can spend 20 minutes at the gym. Progress! 

Beyond the Pale

Pale vs. Pale. We all know people with pale skin. Usually blond or very fair haired with pale, clear skin. Sometimes a very dark-haired person will have clear, pale skin. Older women occasionally have a soft, almost powder white skin even if it is wrinkled. Pale skin can be beautiful. 

So this morning I am looking in the mirror, buttoning my blouse, and I notice my complexion and I am pale. Not the lovely pale of youth and blondness. Not the pale of age and powder. I am a sickly pale. No color. Bland. Now I know Why: I have been sick. I have been fighting a virus for almost a week. Finally at the end of the struggle, I have bathed, dressed and am planning on staying out of the bed all day. And I look like a ghost. 

So - I put on make-up. Brushed on a little powder. Filled in my eyebrows. Put on lipstick that comes close to the color of my sweater. Better. At least not scary. The face that I present to the world, even if the world consists of Oso and Dean, looks a little less pale, a little healthier, a little more energetic. *sigh* Now I need to sit down. 

Movie Reviews

While hanging out recovering, I watched two very special rather cerebral movies that I would like to recommend. I had never heard of either of them, one an Independent Film and one from Canada. Neither had a  “known” name in the cast. Both were gently brilliant in their own way. 

“Obselidia” I chose because it was set mainly in Death Valley where we love to camp and will go in about 6 weeks. It is about two young people with very different views of life and love who confront one another about these subjects while on a bit of a symbolic as well as real journey. 

“Strangers in Good Company” I chose because it was about a group of women of my age and older who find themselves stranded for a couple of days and using their wits and wisdom do ok and share much about life with each other. Although there was a script writer listed, I have a feeling much of the dialogue was filmed as the women talked among themselves. Introspective dialogue was followed by old pictures of the women in their youth ~ actual pictures of these particular women. 

Both of these movies move slowly in terms of plot and action. No thrills or car chases or anything the least bit scary or tension filled. In terms of thought and philosophy and life-learnings, both are filled to the brim with richness and hope, energy and Life. If you like ideas and discussion, pondering and wondering, I highly recommend either one of these for a lovely slow evening before the fire with some cocoa and conversation time following. Enjoy. 

On Being Human

The human heart is an amazing creation. In it we can hold pain and laughter, tears and joy, all at the same time. This morning I went on FB and read that my dear friend’s partner had died. This was not totally unexpected because she had been sick for a long time. Nonetheless, it was painful and I remember that pain and I hurt deeply for my friend. I commented on her two comments, holding her close to my heart ~ and I will continue to do so for a long time to come. 

And then I scrolled down my FB page. 

The very next post was from my college-aged grandson who is a fencer and had (quite accidentally) discovered a fencing club in his college town, attended a meeting and even after a year without a rapier in his hand, in his words, “kicked some ass.” He also tried a sword he had never handled before. He felt Good ~ and his energy and enjoyment poured off the page and I found myself grinning, a great huge smile spread across my face almost to the point of laughter. 

All within seconds of each other, two entirely different emotions, both held closely and deeply in the human heart. I think this is one of the great mysteries of creation and I am truly grateful for it. 

Monday Morning Observations

1) When the kitchen floor is spotlessly clean is the time when you are most likely to spill something on it.

2) When you come in from putting out the trash, you immediately see two or three things that needed to go in the trash.

3) You can do laundry in the nude and there will still be laundry to do. 

4) "For better or worse" doesn't always mean hanging in there through large financial crises. Sometimes it means nursing and cleaning up after your mate has a stomach virus. 

5) Stomach viruses always seem to strike (and I do mean strike) in the middle of the night. 

6) You know he's sick when your morning fire-building husband asks you if you would mind building the fire. 

~ and so the day continues

I Want It Back!!!!

Oh help ~ I really want my computer back. I am never glued to my computer. I go to gym, read books that aren't on Kindle, cook, do other things around the house, go out to lunch. And . . . I write in a journal that is kept on my computer, email, chat with friends in Wales and Virginia and occasionally my daughters. I blog. This week, I needed to make a video - and my script was on my computer. Today, I decided to make banana bread and had to search out my handwritten recipe because I was going to use gluten free flour and wanted to make sure I had all the ingredients correctly measured. I use netflix on my computer and often watch something while Dean is watching news and sports. Oh - I read news and play games on my computer. I want my computer back. 

My journal will just have to wait, except for what I blog here. 
Email is accessed on my phone and I don't type as rapidly there as on my keyboard. 
Chat is out for now.
Obviously I am blogging on Dean's old computer and usually I write my blog in my journal first. 
Dean and his computer took care of making the video. Thank goodness I had written my own script and basically had it memorized. 
Found the hand-written recipe. 
For some reason our wifi is S-L-O-W this week and I don't know whether to blame it or the old computer ~ but for now netflix is really out. 
So I listen in while Dean listens to the news ~ and clicked on links that FB friends had about the Russian meteorite. I get FB on my phone as well. 
For some reason, Dean's computer won't let me play the games I usually play. 

I want my computer back!! Here's hoping The Part arrived yesterday or today and I will get a call on Monday to come pick up my repaired computer. I really am much more dependent on it than I realized until it was gone. Phew. 

For Want of a Director

I have been in some form of theatre for my entire life, although now I consider myself retired. I have acted, directed and finally settled in as a Stage Manager. Some of my acting has been doing monologues in church or other groups. I seem to do ok with those. Today, however, a made a video and had to direct myself. I really, really needed another director.

I needed someone to watch, to notice, to catch. Once I thought I had the spot done, and when watching it, I realized I had said one wrong word, but a very important word, so time to do it again. Of course, the spot is only 90 seconds or less, but a lot can happen in 90 seconds. And when I finally came to the end of the one I thought would work, I realized I would love to have had a director brush through my bangs once before that taping.

I remember a long time ago having a director come on stage and ask me if I realized how often I licked my lips. No. I became aware though and stopped that little habit. Today, I realized how often I blink my eyes ~ not sure how successful I was with stopping that. As I write I am telling myself, I probably should have done it again. Oh well. For someone else, I would have. Dean even said, "I'll go up stairs and take a nap and you can do this all afternoon if you want." And I was tired. I needed him in the office. Who I really needed was a director.

Dean has edited and is sending the video clip to the people who requested it. His technical expertise has been wonderful. Who I also needed was a director.

In Praise of Sneakers

We attended a wedding in Sacramento this weekend. Looking at the map of Sacramento and the location of hotel to church to reception, we decided to walk. The three were a triangle around the capital park. Parking was at a premium. Cabs were in short supply. So the decision to walk was made. Now men can get by in comfy shoes that look ok with their suits. Even my low heel but dressy patent leathers were not made for walking far ~ especially on cement when I am used to the give of good ground. I needed to bring along my sneakers. And a lovely little bag to hold whichever shoes were not on my feet. I wasn’t fond of the idea, but I did it. And I am So Grateful!! First of all, on the walk to the church, I knew if I had been in my dress shoes, I would have been miserable. Instead I was happy, enjoyed the walk, and stopped in the park across the street from the church and changed. No one noticed. 

When I sat down, the woman in the pew behind me spoke to me and commented on my dress. I thanked her and laughing, held up the corner of my bag to show her my sneakers and said, “and don’t these go well with it.” She laughed and pulled out her flats from her bag. We both laughed that at least hers had sparkles on the toes. And - I knew I was not alone. 

Shoe change took place in a secluded nook at the church and in front of the reception hall with no one but me the wiser. At the reception, most high heels ~ and they are Very high this season ~ were kicked under chairs to make dancing more fun and easier. My dress shoes were appropriate for the wedding and reception and I was certainly glad to have my sneakers for the comfort of walking in between. It was a fun night. 

Just a Little Irritation

== I don’t like being threatened or manipulated and that is Exactly what I feel like when I get this kind of email or FB post:

~ only 3% of you will repost this and if you don’t, you don’t care about people who are battling cancer

~ pass this on or repost and an angel will grant all your wishes - but only if you repost in the next 19 minutes

~ Any post that suggests I Don’t Care if I don’t repost or like or in some way respond to whatever the suggestion is

So, my friends ~ I don’t repost or forward or usually in any way acknowledge the viewing or receipt of such a post. My mother died of cancer when I was 16. Don’t tell me I don’t care. God and the angels and I are just fine in our relationship and I don’t need to manipulate them to grant my wishes or prayers. If the quote or saying is something I really like I will sometimes use just it without the manipulative instructions. And occasionally I will repost a wonderful quote like the one from Maya Angelo I shared the other day. 

Having reread this, I realize I sound a little defensive and almost angry. Hmmm - I guess that’s because I am. I wish whoever writes these things - and they are written by someone else and passed on by my friends - would just state the fact and be done. How about: Cancer is a deadly disease and many people are struggling with it. Many have lost loved ones to it. Please, add your prayers of healing to theirs. 

Amen.